Amie O'Brien thinks she cannot reconcile her desire to live in the wilderness with her desire to play horn professionally.
Amie and others of similar inclination should consider applying for the Cabbage Horn Camp next Summer. Only in the Cabbage Horn Camp will you find the perfect blending of musical and natural splendor. Imagine climbing Yosemite's Half Dome by moonlight while practicing "A Night on Bald Mountain." Raft down the Colorado while mastering Grofe's Grand Canyon Suite. Hike through the Amazonian rain forest while performing the Forest Murmurs from Siegfried. Ascend the dizzying twin heights of the Matterhorn and Strauss's Alpine Symphony. Witness the glories of a sunrise on Mount Everest while performing Tchaikowsky's Pique Dame.
For an extra fee, we can arrange for truly dedicated musicians to engage in all these activities behind a screen.
If anyone had survivied last Summer's Cabbage Horn Camp, I'm sure they would have let you know just how much they benefitted from the experience. So don't spend next Summer sweltering in the City! Contact the Cabbage and tell him you....
Gotta go,
Cabbage
(Stunt hornist extraordinaire)
The less adventurous may prefer to spend time at the Cabbage Au Natural Horn Colony, where hornists can leave their cares, valves, and clothes behind.