The first thing you have to understand about Long Island is it's
an island. Seems simple, but it's a fact Jack. We have more coastline then
75 of the other states in the union combined (which sounds very
impressive till you realize places like Nevada just don't add anything
to that total). Long Island was first formed about 40,000 years ago when
it was cold. Then lots of ice formed, pushing part of Connecticut and even
Massachusetts south. It got warmer, and the snow melted. This left the
south fork behind. 30,000 years later it got cold again, making more ice,
and the north fork was formed. The second ice age occurred because God
declared you have a place to grow wine and so you could get away from the
neuvo rich riff raff in the Hamptons.
Long Island is due east of New York City. The most weird thing about the island is about a third of it is part of the City, yet everyone pretends it's not there. Really. Next time you see someone from Brooklyn or Queens, ask them if they are on Long Island. Then will deny it completely!!! For extra fun, ask them just where the bridge to the island is. (Ya don't build a bridge when you're on the same island.) And remember, no matter what they tell you, they have no clue they live on Long Island.
This is all well and good, but it means that geologically LI is boring. All we have is sand and very round rocks. But this does make for great beaches. By the way, these are real pictures of real stuff in Long Island. And yes, most guys here have 10' penises like that guy in the picture (I know I do).
It is a known fact that photographs can only be taken at sunrise or sunset. This page is proof of that. (Well, OK, ducks MAY be photographed during daylight hours)
There is a tourist bureau should you ever wish to visit this island. It is located in an abandon railway car that was left on the side of the expressway. Keep driving out till long after you have to go to the bathroom, it's the first rest stop (OK, ONLY rest stop) on the right.
Ummm, last time I looked there were no bathrooms there. Try the Mobile station at exit 56. Very nice clean bathroom inside, no key needed.
The images on here were liberally "borrowed" from the now defunct Long Island Art Gallery. Dang, I wish I took more while they were around.
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