A young crossdresser recently wrote and expressed the feeling of being lost--that crossdressing seems like an overwhelmingly confusing problem.

Wondering what to advise this person made me think anew about what crossdressing is, and in broad terms, how one should respond to its challenges.

To begin, it's important to recognize that life itself is challenging. Nobody get's a free ride. Everyone is tested. If it isn't crossdressing, it's something else. Be sure of that.

The anthropologist Joseph Campbell had much to say about seeing life as a "heroic quest." He noticed that most myths have the same theme: that of a hero, who: (1) has special abilities; (2) is charged with a heroic task; (3) is presented with great obstacles; and (4) uses his abilities to overcome the obstacles, complete his task, and benefit his tribe/homeland/family, etc.

Campbell saw in this theme a template for our own lives. Myths give us a pattern to follow. Myths are similar because they involve universal issues that apply to each person.

With that in mind, we can be fairly sure of several things:

• There is something beyond the obvious in our life. There is a purpose and a meaning we are not completely aware of.

• We will inevitably be given challenges. In fact, the meaning of life appears related to these challenges.

• Likely *all* of our personal resources will be called upon on our heroic quest. Nothing is given us in vain. Every asset or ability will be needed.

So how does crossdressing figure into all this? Well, first, we know that crossdressing is a challenge. It can complicate our life at several levels. But crossdressing, or at least that part of us that is interested in crossdressing, is also a resource. It makes us unique and gives us certain advantages. So not only must we not let crossdressing ruin our goals, but the heroic pattern would also involves using it to actually support our broad life quest.
 

Achilles and Odysseus

Achilles could run faster, jump higher, dive deeper and come up wetter than anyone in the Greek camp--Odysseus included. Odysseus was tough, but there was no comparison.

But who was the better hero? If you mean by that who is the person presented as a better model for emulation, then that is surely Odysseus. Odysseus, in fact, got a whole epic, The Odyssey, devoted to him. Achilles, as great as he was, merited no such treatment.

It did not help that Achilles got himself killed before the war's end. But this only illustrates a more basic problem. His early death was inevitable. He was far too "macho," too confrontational and one-dimensional. Odysseus, in contrast, was multi-dimensional. He was not just a good athelete and fighter. He was crafty and resourceful as well.

Odysseus went on to become the hero of the quintessential Greek saga precisely because of his multiple talents. He is the everyman. He is like us, and we see ourselves in him--part soldier, part king, part trickster.
 

Odysseus and the Sirens

One is the events on the Island of Circe. Circe was a sorceress who could enslave men and turn them into animals. When they landed on her island, Circe transformed Odysseus' crew into pigs. Parallels to "transformation" stories in transvestite erotic literature seem apparent.

But the important thing is that Odysseus avoided his men's fate. Instead he became Circe's lover.

The motif takes clearer form in the chapter of the Sirens. There, you recall, Odysseus' ship nears the isle of the Sirens. Though Odysseus knows their song drives men mad, he decides to risk hearing it. He has his men lash him to the mast, while they stop their own ears with wax. They then sail near, so that Oysseus can listen.

This episode reveals a lot about the character of Odysseus (and of ourselves). He is the kind of man who just *has* to hear the Sirens. He knows it's risky, but he wants it nonetheless. He will flirt with disaster, but knows he can handle it.

There is more than a little similarity with crossdressing here. The Feminine which beckons us is like the Sirens' song. We are drawn to this indescribable, mysterious, exotic and beautiful femininity. And we know there is danger; many are seduced into drowning or ruin. But we believe we are different. We hope to dance the fine line between enjoyment and disaster.

And that is a normal thing to do! Of course Odysseus wants to hear the Sirens. That's what makes him interesting. Achilles might have prudently steered clear, but not Odysseus. This is part of why Odysseus is a great hero.

So then what can a crossdresser learn from Odysseus?

First we can be reassured by the generality of the problem. Not all men crossdress, but most have a decided and potentially dangerous fascination with femininity. It is the theme's generality that causes it to be placed in a myth like this. So although we express the fascination differently, we are, psychogically, not as different as it might seem.

Second, the point of the story is that one should emulate Odysseus and not other sailors who jumped overboard and drowned.

Odysseus did not deny his desire to hear the Sirens' song. But that did not make him imprudent. He accepted the desire, but did not let it master him. He contrived a way to listen without exposing himself to danger.

In psychoanalytic terms one would say he kept his ego in control. He did not suppress his "id," his sensual impulses. But his ego moderated the circumstances under which desire could be sated. That made him immensely different than all foolish sailors before him who had simply caved in to desire, jumped overboard, and began swimming without any thought of reality or consequences.

Odysseus sets a good example. The urge to crossdress is strong, like the Sirens song. We could resist it, perhaps. But the truth is that we really don't want to. Our problem is not that we have an unnatural attraction to the Sirens. It is that we have a taste of the song and naturally want more.

But it does not follow that we should stop thinking practically, or assume that all is lost. All is not lost. If we play our cards right, we very well might, like Odysseus, have our cake and eat it too.
 

Conclusion

Odysseus heard the Sirens but didn't drown. We can do the same thing. And Odysseus' success in general depended on his curious, adaptable, and innovative nature. Odysseus had no weakness. All his traits could be exploited to advantage in some way. The same is true for us.