Question#17

Question #17 --- Why do so many hypnotists advise me not to the word" TRY?"

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  Many times the new or novice hypnotist will hear that it is inappropriate to use the word "try". This statement is actually somewhat misleading and can remove a powerful tool from a hypnotist's bag of tools.


In our daily language patterns we use the word "try" without any real thought as to implications.

"Try to fix this for me."
"Try to start the car now."
"Try to finish your meal."
"Try to behave."

Compare the following sentences to the ones above:

"Fix this for me."
"Start the car now"
"Finish your meal."
"Behave."

If you listen carefully you can hear that the first set of sentences imply that there will not be a success. The second set implies that there will be success. (If you have difficulty understanding this, simply realize you can substitute the words "could you" for the words "try to" in the first set of sentences)

If you are familiar with the first Star War movie you may remember Yoda saying to Luke "Do or do not, there is no try." Yoda is saying trying is not doing thus there is failure. So if you are trying you are failing. Once you stop trying and actually do the task you have succeeded and are not trying. So when you ask someone to try they expect (or at least accept the idea) that they will not be accomplishing the task.

I mentioned before that never using the word "try" could remove a powerful tool from a hypnotist's bag of tools. This of course is implying that there is an effective way to use the word "try." If you have been following along you realize that the proper use is when you want someone to be unsuccessful. Let's say for example a hypnotist is doing a hands glued (fingers glued - depending upon how you present the experience) hypnotic experience. When it comes time to have the client separate their hands the hypnotist shouldn't be saying, "Now on the number 3 separate your hands." When presenting this experience properly the hypnotist will be saying, "Now on the number 3 you can try, … attempt to separate your hands." With the latter language there is an implication that it will difficult and that there will be failure. The client will attempt and only end up trying but not succeed in separating their hands. (We are of course accepting for the example that the entire experience has been presented properly.)

This is what Milton Erickson says about the word "try"

"E: When I earlier said. "Your unconscious can try anything it wishes," it sounds as if I were giving freedom, but actually that word "try" implies the opposite. The word "try" implies a block. You use the word "try" for your own purpose when you want to imply a block."¹